By Barbara Anne Washington, Esq.

Two months. Six months. Three weeks. It depends upon the person. Marriage. Engagement. For every person asked the answer varies to the question, “How long should one wait before having sex?” Women usually wait longer than men. Younger people wait less than older ones.

The reasons for waiting vary too. They vary from “I don’t want him to judge me,” to “I need to get to know him better,” to “sex complicates things,” —just to mention a few. And it is that complication that has led at least one Kansas City hottie to dispensing with sex altogether.

“I’ve been celibate for about a year,” says Jamel Sims, a 25-year-old Kansas City native. “I do it primarily for religious reasons but it prevents a lot of other things too.”

Celibacy — by definition means “an unmarried person who has taken a religious vow of chastity — has become the alternative for many people wanting clarity in both their relationships as well as their lives in general.

Sims, a semi professional football player, personal trainer and high school football and track coach said the road to celibacy was a difficult one. He realize he wasn’t ready for children, didn’t want to contract any sexually transmitted diseases and wanted to build a solid reputation as a worthy man.

“I’m very grounded in my religion. As a man I realize now that until someone is actually my wife there are certain things I should not give her and that she should not give me. Intimate relations are something that should be reserved for marriage,” he said. “At first it was really hard because I had been sexually active before. But after a few months it became easier to deal with.”