By Myeisha Greene

The single people of Kansas City often say, “There isn‘t a good quality of available men Kansas City. It‘s hard to find a good man in KC”” or “These girls in Kansas City are trifling. All of them have kids and always looking for a dude to take care of them and their kids.” However, there are people in KC that are hooking up and developing relationships that work. With relationships, or lack thereof, it‘s easy to blame the opposite sex rather than point at ourselves to evaluate the problem. If you are having trouble finding love in the city, why not do some self evaluation and see what needs improvement.

Self-improvement begins with identifying the things that hold you back from reaching your true desires. When looking for love, identify the things that may hold you back from meeting your desired mate. And if you continuously attract the same type of guy or girl or run into the same relationship issues, then clearly something needs to change and it‘s probably you. Look into doing different things, exploring new options, or walking new paths to get different and better results. You can‘t go to the same clubs or hang out within the same social circles and expect to find love. The same games are played on the same type of fields. Play a different game on a different field.

Pinpoint the characteristics you would need to help you attract the characteristics you desire from the opposite sex. If you want someone that is athletic and physically fit, then you need to reactivate your gym membership. If you want someone that is financially responsible with a good credit score, then you need to cut up your credit cards, eliminate some debt and begin building your financial future.

These are just the minimal changes to start with, but what about that attitude. When you walk into a party, bar or restaurant, do you smile and appear approachable? When you are approached by someone of the opposite sex, are you respectful, maintain eye contact and project a positive attitude even if you know they do not have a chance? How you treat others is noticed. Yes, this guy may not be your type, as he expresses his interest in you, but by remaining polite and courteous, the more confident and attractive guy across the room is paying attention and may feel comfortable enough to come talk to you.